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Archive for October, 2007

Happy Birthday, Jovan Marie! You’re a TREAT!

Wednesday, October 31st, 2007

She is a cute girl, I remember thinking, the first time I ever saw Jovan. She was the younger sister of one of Tredessa's good friends and so, for a time, she was known to me as "Carli's sister."

When we finally knew her by her name, Dave and I kept pronouncing it all exotic-like with a soft "G" and a swinging "o" sound: Giovanni. "No, no, no," Rocky and Stormie would chide us. "Jovan." "J" sound. Simple. Pretty. Sweet.

I remember the first time Rocky brought Jovan "home." He had just declared that he was not going to date any girls for 2 full years, so I just thought it was Rocky bringing home a friend from the youth group (Jovan and Stormie hung out a lot). I remember her dazzling smile and her shyness. We spoke briefly as I headed out the door. Later Rocky chided me for not being more friendly to her. I should have known right at that moment that not only was he not going to be able to stick to his no-dating-girls-for-2-years proclamation, but that I'd just come across "the one" right there in my living room and I had failed to give the proper fanfare.

I just didn't know. I always tell Jovan now – I was trying to support his non-dating stance. Otherwise, yes, I'd probably tried to have impressed her.

She is an impressive girl, or I guess I should say "woman." She is just so pretty and has the most exotic eyes (eyelash length: 1.769 inches long). My husband knew right away she was the one for Rocky. I thought they were "just friends" because that is what they kept telling me! However, during a youth group trip to California that summer, their "friendship" grew and when he came home, they spent a lot more time on the phone and he would often tell me he grew in his walk with God just by all the conversations they had. He loved talking with Jovan about the Lord. And he loved telling me about how wonderful those conversations were. I thought something was up, but they were only "friends." Right.

Later that year, having watched them dance and laugh and look into each other's eyes at several weddings, her family invited all of us over for her birthday party. Rocky stayed behind and sometime after midnight, just after Jovan turned 17, he kissed her (he assurred me the other night that it was just a kiss – no making out, as if I were still going to try to ground him for something in 2003???). Let the games begin.

They dated. Then they didn't. I missed Jovan during that time. I went almost a whole year without her around. When she came back to hang with Stormie some more around the holidays, she fit. She just fit.

We'd have these crazy huge parties and Jovan would jump right in for the preparation. She'd string lights and make appetizers and run the vacuum. She even cleaned our bathrooms, God love her! Then she would show up to the party as calm and relaxed as could be, welcoming people in her glittery party dress, helping us host way too many people. She was a charmer.

She loves so much of what I love and always affirmed my family life and traditions. We both love over-the-top entertaining and baking and cooking and decorating. She is very sentimental and appreciated my family photos everywhere and the kid's childhood artwork displayed on my walls instead of the "Christian-y" Thomas Kinkaid prints so popular these days. She has honored me by holding the same things dear that mean the world to me – especially Rocky.

If you have seen Rocky or know him at all, you can imagine he was never a boy that was overlooked by the pretty girls. I saw my main job as he grew into a beautiful young man as swatting off the girls who were not right for him. I will never forget a conversation he and I had not long before he and Jovan had reunited into the relationship that would sweep them into marriage and "one flesh." Rocky was weighing some lonliness he was feeling in spite of the time he was spending in friendships with several different girls (who were all wanting more). He was almost 21, a worship pastor, and he knew he needed to be careful in relationships. I was cutting his hair and we were discussing his pros and cons on a variety of young women. It seemed that everytime he had a reservation about an attribute of a girl, I would say, "Well, you need some one like Jovan who…" whatever it was. Her name just seemed to keep coming up.

I don't know if that day was a revelation to him as much as to me as I suddenly saw Jovan in those moment like this: she loves Rocky. When he is in the room, everyone there knows her attention is on him. She receives from him spiritually and honors him as a man of God. She respects the daylights out of him and though I had seen many a young man try to catch her eye, she never wavered, nor flirted back. She was gracious and set. I could see her loyalty as Rocky and I talked that day. I could see that she was wholeheartedly devoted to him. There was no doublemindedness in her. She didn't throw herself at him. She didn't act goofy. She never chased him down. She just remained loyal, true, and godly and very nice to his family. What more could a mom want for her son? I had finally found the only person who would ever love Rocky more than his mommy.

I didn't tell him that. But he knew, too. Very shortly, he announced that he had chosen Jovan. And there she was again, back in our lives in a very comfortable way. Her cute shoes were kicked off at our door and she spent many weekends making herself part of the Rhoades family. When it became official as they married in September of 2006, the memory that stands out the most is watching Jovan look at Rocky like no one else was there and say her vows to him. And I know she meant every single one. They were not just words. She vowed to my son before God and us all. I was blessed because my son was forever surrounded by her love. And she is ours! She is our new baby girl: Jovan Marie Rhoades (she is the youngest of them all, now). I didn't have to carry her for 9 months, but in a way, I carried her for almost 20 years because I prayed for the girl who would someday be my son's wife. I prayed…and God has given me what I asked for…

Today Jovan is 21. She is still this knock-out-beauty-newlywed. She glows as she carries the life of their first baby girl within. She is what she has been since I first met her: she is sweet and kind, tender and sensitive. She is sentimental and thoughtful. I cherish our scrapbooking times together. I treasure the words of affirmation she has spoken over our family. I love how she adores my son. I thank her for seeing the good and accepting the not-so-good parts of us and for choosing to become a part of us and our traditions and weirdnesses and thinking it is all worth it to have Rocky. I love that the grandkids adore Aunt Jovan and that our scruffy family dog found a friend in her, too. I love that she wanted to marry Rocky since she was 14 and that her quiet charm and smile won him over. I love that Jovan is my daughter and when I walk into a room she makes her way to me with a big hug and honors me as her husband's mother, whether I deserve it or not.

I love you, Jovanie. I do thank God for you. You were born to join us. On that day 21 years ago, you were born to be a Rhoades. You are a part of us. Happy, happy, birthday, wonderful woman. Thank-you for accepting us and loving us. Your imprint on our family is getting deeper and deeper. Someday we'll all be a little less sarcastic and little sweeter because of you…

All my love…mom

NOTE TO SELF: More time scrapbooking and going over family history with Jovan – it lightens my heart, it makes me grateful in a huge way!

Pictured: Jovan and her eyes; all my girls left to right: Jovan, Stormie, Stephanie, Tara, Tredessa; me and Jovan and some huge earrings; Rocky and Jovan in Maui on their honeymoon; Jovan right in the middle of the Rhoades tribe about a month before Gemma was born, 4-07.

Posted in Birthdays/Anniversaries, Mi familia, My most unforgettable people, Photos of the Fam, Stuff I actually think | 8 Comments »

Hillbilly

Tuesday, October 30th, 2007

This is not a political post. It just made me smile.

Posted in Stuff I actually think | 4 Comments »

How I Spent My Summer Vacation – The Rhoades Reunion

Friday, October 26th, 2007

They came from Kansas and Missouri and Vegas and Oregon. It wasn't a large group this time. The only "nexgen" cousins were my kids and their kids (and Debbie and Mark's 2 cuties). But my husband's siblings and spouses and his dad got together over the period of a week in late July in various groups and increments which culminated at a country club in Eaton, Colorado that weekend with the whole kit-and-caboodle of us.

It was a sweet and blessed time when we all got a little more vulnerable with each other and promised to stay in touch better (and we are not doing too well on that, actually, yet) and other than Dale's wife, Linda (Rhoades of Oregon), getting mauled by Garry's dog and being rushed for stitches in her hand by ambulance, all were well and healthy and traveled uneventfully. Maybe the dog just bit her, but I like the color of the word maul. I hope that is healing well. I really enjoyed getting better acquainted with Linda this time. She is delightful and I know her well enough to tell you: she really needs the use of her hands.

Everybody brought photo albums to share and some one had the really good idea to bring the very old albums. Dave brought his computer and scanner and we were able to scan Sandra and Larry's (Nenstiel of Vegas) and Garry & Sharon's (Rhoades of Colorado) wedding photos from the 1960's when Dave was a baby and later a ring bearer. We'd never had any of these, so now we have this huge treasure of family photos we'd never have known about, many in black and white. It's like – my husband now has possession of more of his history, memories that were below the surface have had a light shined on them and are emerging.

Sharon (Morrison of Missouri at the time, but who just moved to Washington) got everybody submitting pictures of cakes they have made and decorated over the years and is turning that into a family history of sorts. That was all the fuel I needed for my Ace of Cakes obsession (see my shameless cake promotion here and here, here and here). Some of these I have just done recently, but believe me, Sharon will be getting photos for her cake album! After all the work you put into decorating a cake, it gets cut to pieces and scraped into the trash. But dear, sweet Sharon will honor it and make everyone she knows look at the pictures and all of our hard work will live on in infamy. Her husband Ray (Morrison of Missouri until he moved to Washington this month) is the greatest guy. He is truly a big brother to my husband and all of our kids adore him.

Debbie and Mark (Thomas of Kansas) brought tomatoes from the family farm which were so wonderful I wrote about them previously! Debbie's the "baby" of the family and special to Dave. We were able to get some pics of them together that are so great: big brother and little sister, always. Mark is a fireman and a gentleman. They have the cutest kids and it is so good to see God's favor on them.

Sandra and Larry (Nenstiel of Vegas) are big sister and brother to the whole group, really taking a leading role in strengthening family bonds, gently nudging us together and watching out for us.

Uncle Dale of Oregon, the rough outdoorsman/sportsman sews, we found out and helps a friend with her wedding dress business. Grandpa Rhoades, in his late 80s, still has girlfriends. Ray & Sharon really liked the rocked-out Whitewater service complete with smoke machines and crazy lights, when they attended church with us where Rocky was leading worship just before heading home.

My husband was adopted into a good family. The Rhoadeses are just good people!

Blessings…Jeanie

NOTE TO SELF: Get on it and start writing and calling family more! Make Dave do it, too.

Pictured:The whole group of us at the country club; Garry & Sharon's wedding in the 60s – Dave was the ringbearer; Dave and his baby sister, Debbie; the 6 Rhoades siblings – Dale, Garry, Sandra, and Sharon are seated, Dave & Debbie are standing behind; Dale and Dave with their dad, Raymond Rhoades; me flanked by sisters-in-law Sharon and Sandra

Posted in Mi familia, My most unforgettable people, Photos of the Fam, Stuff I actually think | 2 Comments »

blogger insecurity

Friday, October 26th, 2007

My daughter Stephanie sent this to me when I complained about not getting enough comments from my kids. I thought it was hilarious and the suggestion about posting notes on the fridge as an alternative sometimes seems a valid alternative.

Why do we blog anyway? We want to be heard. We have a voice, things to say. But sometimes you wonder – is it honest enough? Is it too much transparency? Is it valid or timely? Is anyone blessed? One thing that probably helps me keep going is that I am totally "blind," in that I don't even know how to check my stats (other than the ones Technorati shoves in my face which tell me that 1.2 million people are more popular as bloggers than me). I have no idea how many people have stopped by or lurked or whatever? I only know some one has read it if they leave a comment – or e-mail me on the side and mention something I wrote. According to those statistics, I have about 7.3 readers. Keeps me humble.

Blessings…Jeanie

NOTE TO SELF: Be honest. Be true. Write to the unknown reader who might need to read what I have to say.

Posted in Stuff I actually think | 4 Comments »

Submit

Thursday, October 25th, 2007

Whenever I write a comment on some one else's blog, I always hesitate before clicking the "submit" button. I don't really like that button. I don't really like submitting. So in that moment, I always wonder, "Is this comment worth me having to 'submit'?"

Posted in Stuff I actually think | 5 Comments »

Writing Amy Grant fans can WIN!

Wednesday, October 24th, 2007

Dave is running a CONTEST on his site. He will be giving away 3 copies of Amy Grant's new book, Mosaic – Pieces of My Life So Far. All you have to do is share, in 500 words or less, about your favorite Amy Grant song and why you love it. Dave will be the judge and select 3 winners to receive the book, compliments of her publisher, WaterBrook Press (www.randomhouse.com/waterbrook/). He'll also award a signed photo of Amy Grant (www.amygrant.com) and publish his favorite entries on his blog.

I have been reading Mosaic and it is really a good book! It is full of anecdotes and journal entries and memories of people who have impacted her life. There are insights, a discography and her history with pictures. She included questions and timelines and explanations and lyrics to her songs. She shares her poetry, including a haunting piece written just months ago about her son stepping into adulthood as he buries a childhood friend ("…good-bye two boys, hello one man…"). You hear, in her writing, the authentic voice of a woman at peace who has found her truest reflection in the relationships she has – her children, her husband, her parents, her sisters, and all the people God has placed in her path. I don't think you can fake an authentic voice. You hear the whisper of a heart who has faced the scrutiny of public opinion and pain and dark times like we all have and has come to embrace it as blessing, all part of the rich tapestry of life.

Except for the fact that she is this multiple-award-winning performer and an amazingly talented songwriter and famous around the world, I feel like Amy Grant and I have a lot in common. She loves James Taylor and Carly Simon and so do I. There is the whole Kevin Costner thing. And – we have come to some of the same conclusions about life and love and God's faithfulness. I really like this book because it is how I want my blog to be: honest and just who I am, without pretense or posturing. Some days I have an anecdote. Others find me waxing deeply melancholic as I recall people who have contributed to my life and what it has meant to me. Some days I am doling out advice hoping the things I have learned in my growing number of trips-around-the-block will steer one of my children in the right direction. Because, regardless of the material riches I may or may not have to leave my children and grandchildren one day, I do have heart-treasures and stories and words I can give them, which will be the greatest thing I could anyway. I like Mosaic because it landed in my hands at the right time to confirm the importance of "writing and remembering," coinciding with the past 6 months of my quest to put on paper "the chosen treasure of my heart" ( previous references here and here) for my family.

Amy wrote in the introduction: "…I've realized how many days pass in semi-awareness – a kind of busy oblivion. Thanks to writing and remembering, I'm reinspired to value both the mundane and magical moments…In trying to capture a few memories as best I can, I give myself the gift of treasuring what has been so far a very full and meaningful life." And isn't that the truth? It is the exciting and the excruciating, the highs and lows, the good days and the tough, the darkness and the restoration that mark our days and weeks and months and eventually our entire lives.

I love Amy Grant's new book! I am thankful she let us in. I have been listening to Amy Grant since about 1980. Her hits and albums are like life's confetti, sprinkled througout the years marking places and times and seasons. Sadly, though, at times, I participated when it became popular in Christendom (though Christ cannot be blamed for any of it) to criticize her, to judge her walk and her witness and things we could not possibly know anything about – utter stupidity. How wrong. I deeply regret this.

Last September, I got to see Amy Grant live in Loveland and I was just astounded at the grace and ease with which she performed. There was something so honest and pure in not only her vocals, but her connection with this huge audience. She was witty, yet humble. She was wry, but gentle. Not only did she sing beautifully with seeming heartfelt joy, she communicates a song so well. When she sang "Love Me Tender," dedicated to her husband, Vince Gill, I heard the song, really heard it, for the first time. It was amazing and I became, once again, a wildly dedicated Amy Grant fan.

So – creative writers who also love Amy Grant, get over to Dave's site http://www.daverhoades.com/wordpress/ and let something she has already written inspire you to write and win!

Blessings…Jeanie

NOTE TO SELF: I wouldn't have chosen all that has been, all that I've seen. This is why I am glad that the One who can see what I can't -chose the right pieces, led me through the right places to have this life that I love…

Posted in Stuff I actually think | No Comments »

Sincere Apologies from a Baby-Book-Challenged-Mom

Sunday, October 21st, 2007

I recently wrote about being a baby-book-challenged mom and my failure to properly record, in book form, the history of my 5 children (see it here). Oh, occasionally I did some work on the baby books. I started pretty well with Tara's before she was born. I got all the baby shower gifts recorded. Each book had some photos and hospital braceletes tucked in. There was an attempt. It was just a failed attempt.

But I DID keep lots of the bits & pieces of their childhoods – totes full of memories sat on garage shelves waiting for the right time. They were filled with school artwork and favorite little baby outfits from each child. There were special blankets I had sewn and sweet sweaters made by now-deceased aunts. Treasures!

So, I went through everything and kept some of it for the chronicles I am assembling that scream of the faithfulness and goodness of God in our family for the past 26+ years. But mostly, I decided to give the things my children had made and the things we'd collected to represent their lives back to them. I filled these giant hot pink bags with the scraps of their pasts and tied them with big bows and attached my apology-of-sorts letter to each.

Here, in part, is what the letter said:

"THE CHOSEN TREASURE OF YOUR HEART

To my children – What do with this stuff…

I know receiving all these odds and ends and bits and pieces of your lives may cause you to wonder: what am I suppose to do with all this stuff? And why is mom giving back to me the things I made for her as a kid?

Well, I am keeping plenty of little momentos and scraps myself. As you know, I am hard at work cataloguing our lives, creating a chronicle of the adventures that we have enjoyed. I am placing everything in books that I can pull out at a moment's notice and peruse and enjoy, but I am simplifying at this stage in my life. I hope the fact that I have held onto these things for so many years will speak to you of the importance they have had in my heart.

As I have prepared to give these things to you, I have looked at every single item again. I have touched each memory, smiled and cried over piece after piece of our family history. There were little scribble drawings and coupons you gave me along with your incredible artwork and report cards filled with teacher's notes (nearly always good!), and it is all so precious to me. Now I hope you can enjoy it, too.

But, more than anything – I don't want you to be overwhelmed by it. So I am sending along a few suggestions.

When I was a little girl, one of my favorite "books," was the scrapbook my mother had created as she was growing up. She had glued napkins from special parties and locks of hair (hers and family members), photos of her pets and poems she wrote when they died. She filled her book with certificates she won in Sunday School and letters from her mom. There was a hand-written note from Marty Robbins and pictures of Roy Rogers and Dale Evans with their horses. They were her treasures. I loved looking at that book. My mom would only let me see it on special occasions because it was getting old, even then, but sometimes I sneaked to look at it because I found it all so interesting. It told me about my mom before there was me and it contained the true essence of her. The things she saved then, some as far back as over 60 years ago now, still speak about who she is, still bring insight into her heart.

So, I truly see the value in scrapbooks and keeping momentos and keepsakes. There is a huge scrapbook "movement" going on and this really isn't about that. This is just about organizing the pieces of your lives so you can enjoy them. In that spirit, here is what I suggest you do with this huge bag of goodies:

Sit down and start going through.
Anything that brings a bad memory or none at all – toss it immediately. It has no value to you.
Anything that reveals a little about who you are or makes you happy when you see it, glue it into a scrapbook or place it in a page cover in a notebook. Then, every birthday, get it out and remember and think about how these items contributed to who you are. Share it with your children. They will love it, they will love your story.

It is amazing how the things we write or draw or won as a child shape us as adults. I recently went through many of my belongings and ended up throwing away a lot of things that reminded me of a person I no longer am and never again want to be. But I am choosing, from the chosen treasure of my heart, to hold onto things that have brought me to where God always wanted me to be – the person He originally intended.

Memories are a tough thing sometimes. They can play tricks on us. At [48], I have made a decision to spend the last half of my life remembering the good stuff, the laughs, the successes, the wins – my chosen treasures. This is why I am cataloguing the blessed life I have been given. I am remembering the goodness of the Lord, the heritage He gave me, the legacy He is allowing me to leave. I am recalling His provision and His confidence in me to be your mother.

This is my chosen treasure. I hope you'll find some of yours in this collection of stuff."

Blessings my parent-friends – it's not too late to bless the kids!… Jeanie

NOTE TO SELF: As I look around my house, the photos, the objects d'art, the books, the letters, the stuff…I am blessed, rich, at peace. There has been some pain along the way, yes, but it has been gloriously outweighed, richly overtaken by blessing. God is faithful. He is so faithful.

Pictured: the kids as three mice and 2 kittens and as beauty contestants and MC (clothes from various weddings they did that year), October 1987.

Posted in Home, Memories/Melancholy, Mi familia, Photos of the Fam, Stuff I actually think | 2 Comments »

The End.

Thursday, October 18th, 2007

The water-starved begonias are actually thrilled at the current cold nights and cool days and are full and lush and happier than they've been all year. The potted petunias have even happily brightened in color and fattened in the fall weather.

The birdhouse gourds and pumpkin patch have browning vines, indicating they have done all they can do – it is time to reap the harvest.

The grass is green without the effort of the summer season. The celosia and cosmos have soared to great new heights.

But the oranges and reds and purples of autumn around the border are slowly taking over the spotlight where annuals once worked hard in a too-bright summer sun to carry the show.

Alas, the forecast says snow in Denver this weekend. There is a storm brewing. It is, it appears, the true end of summer.

My question is this: can I still save my favorite tomato plant???

Blessings…Jeanie

NOTE TO SELF: Try to save the tomato. Try.

Posted in Garden/Food/Seasons, Home, Stuff I actually think | 5 Comments »

Confessions of a Babybook-Challenged-Mom

Thursday, October 18th, 2007

The lead character in the musical, Oliver sings:

Who will buy this beautiful morning

and put it in a box for me?

So I can see it at my leisure,

whenever things go wrong.

And I can keep it as a treasure

to last my whole life long?"

I failed my children in baby-booking. I did. I just stunk at it. Their entire lives, the guilt of the knowledge that I had not filled out the dates on the teeth-cutting-arrival charts gnawed at me relentlessly. Pages with the words paste photo here nakedly jeered at me, taunting my inability to create a wondrously meaningful book for posterity.

It wasn't that I didn't have photos to paste. It wasn't that I didn't delight at the clink of the spoon on a newly-emerged tooth or want to remember every single, tiny moment of their first days. I saved everything for each of my children from the second I knew they were coming. It was almost a sickness, induced, I fear, by having a parent who saved nothing. We took untold thousands of photos of these 5 incredible children. They were also often undeveloped for a really long time.

But somehow, I just didn't do well at putting things in their books. I think my perfectionistic tendancies (aka my all-or-nothing sickness) interferred. "Today I must focus entirely on the babybook and fill in each line and glue the proper photos as directed," was my heart's desire, but didn't happen, couldn't happen, because life was happening. When you are deeply involved in your husband's ministry, right at his side AND almost annually producing a new human being, leisure time to cut and paste and record gets put on the back burner - or in my case, books safely tucked into their original boxes, high on a closet shelf.

The other day my daughter Stephanie kind of snickered that when I'd presented her baby book to her there was nothing in it. I guess I thought maybe "the thought" would count. "Yeah-there is nothing there, but look at this beautiful book I was thinking about fixing up for you!?" Stephanie has Gemma's babybook close by, on top of the television armoire and is a really good baby-booker. She obviously did not inherit this from me.

But momentos and keepsakes? Oh, I kept them. I kept the baby advertising magazines from 1979, 82, 83, 84, and 1986 so they could know what having a baby "looked like" when they were born. I retained ticket stubs and mimeographed school programs. There were hastily ripped-out Family Circus cartoons that reminded me of my own crew ALONG with newspaper clippings of letters to the editor I had encouraged my kids to write. I kept Mother's Day's cards (I have a lot of unredeemed homemade coupons I'd like to cash in on now!) and "I'm sorry" notes both from and to me. Our annual family Valentine's Day love letters to each other filled decorated cereal boxes. I kept report cards and test scores and Sunday School papers and snippets of hair.

But I didn't keep baby books well. Not at all.

Recently, Tredessa and Stormie helped me go through totes and totes of keepsakes. Our whole family's lives were contained in them. We read their stories and laughed until we cried. I put aside love letters between Dave and I for another day and started a collection of favorite letters from my parents because someday those will be all I have to hold close. We threw away report cards with grades we chose not to recall and saved only the cards which told the truth of how delightful and perfect my children are. We threw away sad junk and chose the treasures of our lives which will become memories we hold close.

I saved a bunch of things for a project I am working on. I am creating something of a "Chronicles of the Dave & Jeanie Rhoades Family," so I need material. And I am not lacking. It is probably 20 volumes with photos and special momentos and written memories, by now.

But there was a lot left over. So I decided to give my kids each a big, big bag of their stuff, their history, their past. Because really, it is in adulthood that we start to appreciate and relish each "scrap" of our lives. Maturity brings a reverence for the past in a strong way, causing us to realize how all the little tidbits carefully glued into a scrapbook or baby book or stored in a dusty box are really the materials that mirror the essence of us.

Some one else may look at our things and wonder why we are keeping them, but we can look at them, just as I have often looked at my mother's crumbling and deteriorating childhood scrapbook, and see ourselves in the reflection of it. And we will hold on to those things as long as we are able, because they are our history, our beginnings – the story we will tell and pass on, the legacy we will leave.

So – my kids each got this giant, colorful bag of stuff with a big bow on it and a letter from me – an "apology" of sorts. They didn't get a well-put-together baby book. I failed at baby-booking. But they got the treasures I safeguarded while we were creating the histories they have. They got some scraps of this and that that prove that I love them with my whole heart – baby book completed or not.

Now you know for sure – I wasn't a perfect mom…Jeanie

NOTE TO SELF: Keep only the chosen treasure. Throw everything else away.

NOTE TO MY KIDS: I got lots of glue sticks at a back-to-school clearance sale. Wanna glue your own stuff in your baby books???

Pictured: Dave and "the tribe" June 1987. L – R are Stormie (1), Rocky (2 1/2), Tara (8), Stephanie (5), and Tredessa (4)

Posted in Home, Memories/Melancholy, Mi familia, My most unforgettable people, Photos of the Fam, Stuff I actually think | 10 Comments »

Dear Audrey – The Bride Inside

Wednesday, October 17th, 2007

I've been writing some advice letters to my sweet friend, Audrey, who is about to be married. She said I could. At my age – you love doling out the advice! Haha! There are 2 previous letters to Audrey here and here.

Dear Audrey,

Words are powerful. Words can bring life or death. It is a sad day when we no longer care about what our words will do to another person.

My caution to you is this: be careful – full of care – with all your words in your marriage. And always know that what is inside will come out – eventually. So keep it sacred. Get washed with the water of the Word of God.

This is from a Jack Hayford message called "The Power of Words." More specifically, he talks about "The Power of Words in a Marriage."

The most destructive word that can be spoken into a home between a husband and wife is the word divorce. Even if it's just intimated in a moment of anger, "Well, do you want a divorce?!!" and then followed by "I didn't mean that," the word was spoken, and here's the problem: There are certain words and attitudes that are actually names of spirits. And there is a demon of divorce. Once you name it in your household, you have given it license to hang around and watch for its opportunity to advance its intent. It has only one goal – to destroy your marriage. And you decide whether to give it place.

From out of the kingdom of darkness, Satan seeks to controvert God's words. The Bible says, "The weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments…" (2 Cor. 10, 4, 5). The "arguments" referenced here are not theological debates, but calculated plans - logismo - words with the power to multiply their impact and to mount up and build a case ("stronghold") against you.

Strongholds are ensconced…and the way they got there was by words that licensed a spirit to construct for itself a turf it has every right to occupy because of the decisive, detrministic capacity given to our words by God. But [with our cooperation] – our confession of sin – God [can] controvert that.

Confession of sin -homologeo- means, I say what God says about this. God says it's wrong, so I am saying it's wrong. Once I begin to agree with God, instead of insisting on my own way, revelation comes, repentance takes place, and I turn away. When, with our words, we confess our sin and repent, we give Almighty God room to sweep in, and Satan no longer has …license to claim that ground anymore.

Say what God says about you and Ben. Guard your words. Speak life…joy…goodness…happiness, and goodness and mercy will follow you all the days of your life!

Blessings on the upcoming marriage!…Jeanie

PICTURED: a piece of Audrey's art, Audrey with her finacee, Ben

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