This is my dedication going out to you tonight – with a house full of grandbebes (the fruit of our lives and love) and “Gilligan’s Island” too loud on the TV and Star Wars guys strewn all over…dedicated to the one I love:
There’s no, no looking back for us
We got love sure ‘nough, that’s enough
You’re all I need to get by…
All the joys under the sun wrapped up into one
You’re all, you’re all I need to get by.
Except it isn’t really carved wood. That is me looking through it, there on the left.
The M-O-B and the M-O-G (mother-of-the-bride and the mother-of-the-groom, me and Tammy)
I needed a good-sized, ornate-ish frame for the old-fashioned-family photo booth and just didn’t have time to go shopping for one. So one afternoon when Hunter came over. We decided to make our own.
That is it the “open” frame on left. This is Ryan and Tredessa “trying out” the photo booth a few days before the wedding when we were at the barn decorating. When I was finished, I realized that I really could have accomplished the same effect with a much larger “frame” by using a piece of foam core or cardboard cut into a frame shape. Just a little FYI on the DIY!
Niece, Elise posed in honor of her lover-husband who could not attend.
Dana and Jason hammed it up for quite a few good shots!
Two of my grandbebes, confetti girls Gemma and Averi with Ryan’s little flag-boy, Cody. CUTE!
~~~
Photos: Chronos Images (Matthew Greenlee and Rachel Ruge) and Lilac Photography (Eldeen Pickett)
A casual, vintage scene has been set. Welcoming!
On the right, you can see the jars hanging from the tree with subtle (and non-fire-hazard) illumination.
This pretty little sign was painted by Mairin Bierer. It hung across the aisle before the bride and her attendants came to walk it. We were all family.
The centerpieces included old books from the bride, French labels with romantic quotes and song lyrics, milk-glass containers, candles, dusty-green sprays…
As soon as that was over, we met weekly to create and glue and make and dream and talk and laugh and plan and gather supplies and create timelines. It was a very DIY vintage-y wedding, for sure.
It is hard to recall who exactly saw which idea first but along the way we had giant paper flowers, and old frames with lace. Tredessa brought a big stack of old lace curtains over and we created “lace balls” by using a glue mixture on the lace and forming it around balloons. When it was dry, we popped the balloon and voila: a lace balloon ball to hang from the ceiling.
Tredessa really liked the idea of a barn for a wedding and in short order her old roommate introduced us to a family who’d built a small barn on their 17 acres. They used the downstairs of the barn for the owner’s hobby of hand-carving wooden carousel animals (which are amazing!) and the upstairs for family celebrations. It was perfect!
We realized that to have a wedding ceremony, a celebration dinner, and photobooth and a dance floor all in one spot would be a tight, tight fit. So Dessa decided to pray about finding a nice, small church for the ceremony and the next thing you know, New Horizons Christian Fellowship opened right up for us. It was so cool, right across the interstate from the barn!
We used things we have, antiques and vintage items to decorate at the wedding. This old typewriter was at the guest table.
I have to say I have some talented kids. Stormie designed and printed the super-cool wedding programs with the full love story on them.
Jovan created the flower mobile that hung over the guest table.
The wedding party on a framed poster. Jar candles on a rustic candleabra for ambiance.
A felled branch was wrapped in white satin ribbon and candles in jars, along with lots of glass and heavy crystals embellished the “tree” we created. The whole backdrop was draped in cottons and canvases creating a living room atmosphere.
The sidewalk to the church was lined in the trademark-Rhoades-family luminarias. We used framed lace at both the church and the barn for the dinner celebration.
The gift area was comfy and merchandised with antiques. Mercury-glass love birds on an old window from Tredessa’s grade school, touches of home.
Left, Tristan playing at the wedding. Right, Tredessa and Ryan scattered photos of great-grandparents around the reception, witnesses to long love, a nod to their heritage.
An old brass and crystal chandelier got a coat of white paint for the wedding. It hung right over the bride and groom during dinner.
Chronos Images* Tredessa at the barn a couple of hours before the ceremony.
Tredessa and Ryan having fun in the photobooth. Tredessa with her matron-of-honor, big sister (by 1 year and 3 weeks), Stephanie
Tredessa was radiant. Beaming, even.
After her engagement, she wrote a wedding plan. Most brides decide on definitive colors and places and and details concerning things. And Tredessa had thoughts on that, but her main wedding plan was about it being fun and family and intimate and closeness and relaxation and rejoicing. She wanted everyone who came to feel peace. She wanted everyone to have a romantic night of dancing and celebration. Her plan came together!
Seeing Guini tapping and twirling, dancing with abandoned glee with her daddy, turns and twists and getting-dipped. She looked beautiful. She felt beautiful. She was free and full of joy. One of the favorite moving-picture memories I now carry in my heart.
I had this magnificent bridal bouquet in mind and it did not turn out that way at all, which was stressing me out the night before. I dreamed of it when I barely slept. But in the morning, I remembered that Tredessa wasn’t all “flowery” anyway. I disassembled everything I had begun the night before, left 75% of it on the counter, put in the 6 white roses, the spray of naked-lady lilies, the small bunches of white spider mums and lots of vintage buttons and a couple of brooches and the succulents I had grown just for the occasion. I hand tied the smaller, very specifically-structured bouquet and wrapped it in satin ribbon overlaid with chiffon to match her dress. And in the 5 minutes it took to assemble after all the worry, it looked like a reflection of her ring – a perfectly lovely, vintage-y, love-with-a-history bouquet. And I knew it was perfectly right for the slender, beautiful hands that would carry it.
Delicious food made by loving, generous hands of a good friend. Vintage-y. DIY. A barn wedding. Using old family photos, chandeliers, creating a “living room” experience for the church-front. These were bits and parts of the the most beautiful wedding in 2011!
Dave barely even sniffled during the ceremony. Shocking! He is tender-hearted towards his kids. He was engaging, effusive and funny, even. Everyone loved the ceremony.
Three days with our familia from Florida. Ryan’s brothers and their fams and his parents and grandparents and uncle…We gathered in tight for traditional Thanksgiving on Thursday, had rehearsal and dinner on Friday and danced together on Saturday. We loved them all and just melted together. Familia!
Ryan’s mom (my new “sister” from Florida) told me, just before Ryan walked us to our seats, “You are beaming.” And I knew I was. I could feel the glow, so proud of my daughter and so pleased with her choice.
Ryan’s vows to my daughter were beautiful. Hers to him nearly knocked breath from me, so full of promise and depth and wisdom from observation. I was unprepared for the tears that bursted forth.
The church was very small,. We draped everything is fabric, off-white cottons and canvases, and used lace-filled frames and big paper flowers strewn about as a backdrop.
First dance: “You’re just too good to be true, can’t take my eyes off of you…”
So pleased that you found each other and had those 3 amazing kids and are living and loving and building a beautiful life together. So proud of you. Congratulations, Steph & Tris! LOVE YOU!
The scripture I circled and signed in Tredessa and Ryan’s wedding Bible, from Ephesians 4:
“1 As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. 2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. 3 Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. 4 There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism; 6 one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.”
INFJ that I am, I am drawn to scriptures about “guarding” things (“make everey effort”)…
I am actually running around like a crazy woman doing wedding stuff, Thanksgiving stuff, wedding stuff, company-coming prep, wedding stuff, and etc…
Am I deliriously happy for Dessa and Ryan? I am. Will I live through the extreme joyousness? I will. Do I love it all, all the craziness, and zany, over-the-top preparation and celebrating? I do. I really do. For real!
Making the house ready for company for the festivities, I re-arrange the furniture in her old room. I have placed the bed where she kept hers the years she was here. For a moment I close my eyes and I recall the perfect white-and-navy, tailored room. There was a star-shaped metal lantern suspended exactly 12″ from the window, perfectly centered. Shelves lined with books and photos, a place for everything and everything in its’ place.
As meticulous as she is, you might be surprised if you learned how many things she loves, how many interests she has: art, music, reading, learning, the Word, love and romance. She is a veritable walking “imdb,” able to not only quotes lines from hundreds of movies, but also possesses the ability to “name that actor,” any actor and tell you every major role they have ever played. She and her dad used to play their own 6-degrees-to-Kevin-Bacon before it was a real game. And she loves children (dotes on her nieces and nephews, especially) and missions work and has traveled and taught and ministered across the nations. Yes, Tre is multi-faceted and multi-talented.
For a minute or two, I allow myself the luxury of remembering Tredessa in this house, a young girl becoming a woman. I recall her consecration to Christ and her refusal to “date around” to find the man God would send. She had decided on her own that it was a waste of good emotion to fall in and out of love and she would have no part of it. She was ever and always waiting for the “one.” This lucky “one” would get all of her love, all the depth and breadth and width of it (Lucky Ryan!). Meanwhile, she brought goodness and godliness into this house and our family.
She was the third of our children. She had the long-Averi-type hair and a raspy voice. When we’d get a drink for her and her sisters to share at a drive-through, little 3-year-old Tredessa would ask, “Can I be in charge of the drink, daddy?” Already showing she was willing to carry the responsibility of a big task, already being groomed by God to lead a massive music festival one day.
But in this house, 9 years ago, she was finding her way, discovering God’s plan for her life. And in that room, she was seeking Him for all she was worth. And loud? Oh my. Her room and the bathroom and hallways were always pulsing with amplified praise! There was life, lots of life. And lots of long, dark hair everywhere. And a bathroom full of girl products.
Then today, as I sat remembering, I recalled a scene so distinct it seems yesterday – truly as if it were. just. yesterday. Yet, it was also so common it could have been one of any number of days. Dave and I had been out, perhaps grocery shopping, on a fall day. Tredessa’s car was in the driveway so I knew she was home, but I didn’t see her. There was music coming from her room. When I went upstairs, I peeked through the door, which was slightly ajar. She had the curtains drawn so the room was dark. She was on the floor worshipping the Lord, her hands upturned, tears streaming down her face ~
I lift my eyes to you Eyes that have seen a thing or two Who is this stranger in my life?I lift my hands to you Hands that have carried what is true Intimate stranger be my life
And my heart swelled in the moment, watching her so unaware, just loving her Savior, consecrating anew. And she sang along with Rita Springer,
Jesus I love you Jesus I adore, I adore You Jesus you still have my affection and my song will be “I love you”And I cried in the memory and thought how blessed that room is. And in all the years she waited, Dessa did not wait alone. She has been a faithful bride to Christ. And she loved Him. And He has loved her back.
And in two weeks, she will join Ryan at an altar. And God will be a witness and He, like me I bet, will be remembering all the lovely songs she has sang to Him and will be thinking what a blessed man Ryan is to get her.
