The song of the year for me has been Matt Redman's "Never Let Go." I was in the middle of a free-fall emotional, physical and spiritual crash last summer the first time I heard Rocky lead it the Sunday Whitewater kicked off at Northern Hills Christian Church last July. I couldn't even sing it. Though many around me were singing with strong conviction, pain-pregnant tears streamed down my face and I could only listen and try to grasp on to the hope of the Psalm 23-based lyrics.
By the time the song reached and boldly declared this refrain, "I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on – There will be an end to these troubles, but until that day comes – still I will praise You, still I will praise You!", I wasn't sure if I could actually see that light, but I knew that nothing – not one circumstance, not the loss and pain I was feeling – would stop me from praising God and giving Him my worship.
I thought, "If this is all I can do, worship Him through these less than ideal days, then that is what I will do."
Many times in the ensuing year, I have joined those aforementioned voices, belting out the great hope: "I will fear no evil for my God is with me, and if my God is with me, whom then shall I fear?" Yes, that Matt Redman definitely wrote the song for that time, for my life.
I didn't realize it until last week when Rocky led that song again at church (it has been awhile), but I was really needing that reminder and the words washed over me and made me amazed, once again, at the goodness of the Lord who just absolutely, never – He just refuses – to let go of me."Even when I'm caught in the middle of the storms of this life I won't look back, I know You are near… Oh, no, You never let go through the calm and through the storm Oh, no, You never let go in every high and every low Oh no, You never let go – You never let of me…"
Still I will praise Him!…Jeanie
NOTE: Hear the song here. This youtube video is a collage of slides some one put together to Matt Redman's recording. They're OK. Personally, I'm just closing my eyes to listen to the words of hope, healing, assurance and promise. By the end I may have my hands raised to heaven and be laughing with joy, who knows? "I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on…"
NOTE TO SELF: Hold on.