I FIND THIS (very humbling) NOTE FROM TREDESSA: Please post on your blog:)
TITLE: To a mother who blogs from a daughter who doesn’t
By: Jeanie’s daughter, Tredessa
My mother usually starts off her children’s birthday blogs by remembering the day we were born; her first encounter with us; the beginning of our relationship. I can’t say that I remember that far back. I can never remember a time without her. It doesn’t exist for me. So I can’t say what my world was like without her.
I can only postulate what it would have been like…
My life might be devoid of a wisdom I’ve learned from her.
I might not understand the importance of choosing a Godly husband.
It’s possible I wouldn’t know a thing about events – wouldn’t have the deep love for them that I do – might not be able to pull one off for all the money in the world.
I could know nothing about how to decorate a house or how to turn someone else’s garbage into gold.
I would probably be imbalanced in my thinking with no one to tell me when I’m over-analyzing; with no one to bring peace where I’ve gotten myself worked up; with no one to give hope where my disposition may cry that there is none to be found.
I might not have learned the danger of religion over relationship and therefore hurt many by keeping them in spiritual bondage as a result.
I probably would have chosen to let past wounds breed inside me until I was a hollow, emotionless shell, lashing out at anyone who tried to get close, inside of choosing to let the Healer come in and restore broken areas.
I wouldn’t have the deepest love of worship and could carry no tune.
There would have been no years of teaching on a healthy marriage and parenting to learn and commit to before those blessings have happened.
I may not know what it means to be a woman in the truest sense of the word.
I wouldn’t have learned to love the Word of God by seeing a mother who learned it, loved it and lived it day in and day out when no one was watching.
My love of writing would have had no example and nurturing to give it wings.
Prayer would have remained something that stayed in church and was reserved for Sunday mornings only.
Church would have remained a building, a place that you attended and left behind instead of a fellowship of like-minded, like-hearted individuals.
Endurance through suffering would have been something I ran from and didn’t embrace as a necessary part of growing up and maturing.
Self-discipline would be a four-letter word and I would have thrown my life away seeking pleasure at all costs.
I would have taken deep hurts from the past and grown bitter; choking on them, instead of forgiving, desiring true freedom and moving on.
I would never know the importance of what one woman, who believes her life hasn’t amounted to much, could truly impact a generation; could bring life through her wisdom and experiences and advice; could save my life so many times through her prayers and love; could show me what a true wife, daughter, friend, sister and mother looks like.
This speculation is just that…speculation; and I’m glad to leave it at that. The life I’m describing looks bleak and not worth living. For millions of individuals in the world, the enemy has stolen away a precious part of truly living…their mothers. Why does God deem me worthy enough to have kept mine and not just that, but to have given me a mother that blows me away? I’m not worthy, but I am so thankful.
Mama, as the years go on, I imagine that I will say many times that I haven’t told you enough how important you are to me; how much I love you; what you’ve done for me, but – like moms usually do – I hope you know these things by:
- The time that I spend opening my heart up to you, looking for insight, taking your advice
- The words that come out of my mouth concerning you
- And the way I mimick you in so many ways throughout my life
You are my mother and I will always shout that from the rooftops in grateful awe at how much God’s love has saved me from who I could have been without you.
I love you, mama. Happy Mother’s Day!
Note to self: Remember that Jeanie Rhoades has served me selflessly for almost 26 years. Bless her by doing the same with my children and return that service to her for at least the next 26.